Walking the line...

I walked out the door at Remedy Coffee into a torrential downpour. I'd been writing for about an hour and a half on a paper about routine and advertising. Little did I know I would walk out and encounter a soaked, frightened woman by the name of Amber.

"'Scuse me." She said.

I looked at my phone, holding my umbrella and tried to look as busy as I could. I was running late to my weekly "Entrepreneurs of Downtown" meeting (aka, $2 pint night at Barley's).

"I'm tryin' to aks you a question."

"Ok, what can I do for you" I asked as exasperatedly as I could in the pouring rain.

Amber then proceeded to tell me that she was being followed. That's not that unusual in the Old City. After all, it is close to the Greyhound station and Knox Area Rescue Ministries.

I asked if she wanted me to call an officer.

"No" she pleaded. "Please don't" as big drops of rain rolled off of her coke-bottle glasses.

She then proceeded to tell me about a woman, who I had seen walk into the shop, that was supposed to be helping her out by getting her medication for her epilepsy.

She proceeded to tell me how her husband had been beating her and was now in jail in Nashville, and how her kids hadn't eaten in two days.

As I tried to hold my umbrella over her, I struggled.

"Do I give her money," I thought to myself?

"Well, what can I do to help," I asked.

Amber pleaded for money to get her medication and feed her kids. I thought about the wedding coming up. I thought about all the times that I had heard horror stories about people going and buying drugs. I thought about the "lowlifes" I had given a few cents to before, jut to get them to be quiet and leave me alone.

"I'm sorry, I don't have any cash on me and I don't feel comfortable giving you money."

The tears, mixed with the raindrops, began to roll down her cheeks.

To make a long story short, I helped her out. I gave her a few bucks and some coupons to Chick-fil-A. Admittedly, I felt like a jerk for feeding her the crap about me being too busy and not being able to help out when I very well could.

As she and I parted ways and I popped up my umbrella again, the following verse came to mind:

James 2:15-17 (New International Version)

15Suppose a brother or sister is without clothes and daily food. 16If one of you says to him, "Go, I wish you well; keep warm and well fed," but does nothing about his physical needs, what good is it? 17In the same way, faith by itself, if it is not accompanied by action, is dead.

I know what all of the professionals in public service say. "Don't give them anything! Your just enabling them! We've got services that are aimed at eradicating this!"

I have no end of respect for what those folks do for our community. But what about meeting the immediate need? I have no way of knowing if Amber was telling me the truth. There were parts of her story that didn't jive. So?

There's a fine line to walk between giving handouts and meeting a legitimate need. Do I know if Amber's was legitimate? No. Did I want her off my back? Yes. Am I a hypocrite for my motives? Probably. Let's just say that I didn't do it for the gold star I'll get after Sunday night's sermon (insert sarcasm).

Ultimately, I don't own what I have, if I follow a biblical line of thought. Ultimately, I am to be a steward of what I've been given. For some reason, I walked out the door, in the pouring rain, to meet a friend who never got my text about meeting up. Can I say without a doubt that there was a reason for me doing that? Nope.

However, there have been times in my past, where I've been without resources. There have been times where other Christians have told my family (and me) "Go. I wish you well. Be warm and well-fed" and walked away giving us only a Bible scripture to pay the bills with.

Faith without deed is dead faith, whether KARM is just down the street or not. Bible verses won't put food on Amber's table, nor will they help with her epilepsy (if she really has it).

The only thing that I can do, is do what I felt inclined to do at the time, and trust that if I believe in who God says he is, that what little I gave Amber will help and that she'll be better off because of it.

Cheap Community/Cheap Grace

"Cheap grace is the grace we bestow on ourselves. Cheap grace is the preaching of forgiveness without requiring repentance, baptism without church discipline, Communion without confession.... Cheap grace is grace without discipleship, grace without the cross, grace without Jesus Christ, living and incarnate."
— Dietrich Bonhoeffer (The Cost of Discipleship)

Earlier tonight, I was reading a blog by a fellow, presumably young, who was talking about creating community through his blog. The whole thing focused on "creating community beyond the blog." Presuming that these relationships would still be viable once the fellow and his blog followers met in real life, the post got me thinking about community.

It's not until you've seen someone at their worst and continue to stick with them that you realize how much community costs you. It's not until a couple's marriage falls apart, or a single mom can't pay the electric bill, another person tells you that your past has made you irredeemable that you realize what true community costs you.

If I am content to post a comment on a blog and call it community, then I have cheapened community. If I walk into small group and don't engage with the other people there, then I've cheapened community. If I ignore the panhandlers that sit outside after church on Sunday nights, then I've cheapened community.

Let's take Bonhoeffer's quote and rework it: "Cheap community is the community we bestow on ourselves. Cheap community is the preaching of forgiveness without requiring repentance, baptism without church discipline, Communion without confession.... Cheap community is community without discipleship, community without the cross, community without Jesus Christ, living and incarnate."

I can walk into service on Sunday night and call it community all I want because of the fact that there are other people there. I can say that this post "creates community" because someone might interact with it. But in the end, I've sacrificed nothing. Other than my time, there has been little cost to my actions.

I'll sum this all up in the comment that I left on the fellow's blog: "Community that doesn’t leave you exhausted after an encounter is cheap community. It’s something that doesn’t require you to get your hands dirty. It’s a committee meeting that’s merely talked about something instead of having acted. It’s cheap grace.

There’s a reason that Christ spent three years with his disciples and not five minutes. There’s a reason that he overturned tables, called out pharisees, and invested not only time, but his very blood into creating the Church.

If I am content to call my commenting on your blog community, then I’ve short-cut the very thing that Christ set as an example. Because here, on this blog, I don’t have to know you. I don’t have to know your story. I don’t have to know what makes you the person that you are. I don’t have to see the things that you will never share in public. I will never have to work side by side with you, or say that something you said pisses me off but am still committed to investing into your life."

Restorative Relationships

David asked me to post some information here about the restorative justice class that's being offered on Thursday nights. I told him I'd be glad to... mostly because I'm super excited about the class. This past Thursday night was fun; we had a wonderful turnout and lots of great discussion. See I think the thing is this: relationships are messy (Remember the scene in Frosty the Snowman where Professor Hinkle breaks the eggs all over the floor and says: "messy, messy, messy"? My favorite line in a Christmas movie ever!) So anyway, relationships aren't easy and they can get ever more difficult when conflict ensues or when opinions are diverse or when trust begins to erode. So when things begin to unravel (or crack on the floor), how do we handle the conflict? how do we restore the relationships? How do we rebuild trust? I believe there are some principles that can help to answer these questions. I don't think they are easy principles, but neither do I think we're alone in trying to work them out.

We will meet upstairs at Cafe 4 (sometimes in the library and sometimes in the conference room) from 6:30-8:00. Here's a basic overview of the 6 weeks:

October 7 Respect, Honor, Compassion: Seeing the Imago Dei in one another

October 14 Expectations and a Belief in Redeemability: Seeing beyond what IS to what can be

October 21 Needs: Seeing and addressing what’s going on

October 28 Solutions With: Working through conflict…together

November 4 Restitution: Apologies, forgiveness, and making things right

November 11 Community: Moving from me to we

Each week will be self-contained (more or less), focusing on a different principle of restorative justice and how that principle applies to our relationships. So, if you can't make them all, or if you missed last week, come anyway; you won't miss anything you can't catch up on.

I'd love to hear feedback and comments as well. Feel free to email me or post a comment here. Shalom y'all.